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User blog:TheIllusiveMan227/On the Subject of Help
I didn't go to uni. I was not special enough. I was too lazy. But that will not stop me from writing essays. So here is my exactly 506 word long essay on help Help is great. Help brings us assistance. Help brings us guidance. Help brings us help. When we need help, we ask for help. When we don’t need help, we ask for help anyway. Because help is help, and being helped is great. Being helped brings us a nice fuzzy feeling, because being helped makes us feel helped. There is no feeling more satisfying feeling in the world, other than being helped, than being helped, as receiving help when we need help gives us help. Help is a metric that can be measured by helpfulness; using a helpful scale, we can judge the helpfulness of help. On one axis we plot “Helpedness”, and on another we plot “Helpfulness”. Through careful plotting, using helpful equations and helpful instruments such as protractors (Helpful in drawing circles, which are helpful for a variety of architectural purposes), we can determine the helpfulness of help on a linear scale ranging from “Helpless” to “Helpful”. In addition to mere helpfulness, we can judge the helpfulness of help by determining the quantity of help. Outside of a fringe case of scenarios, the reasonable assumption is that the more help given, the more an individual is helped. Again, this phenomenon is observed regardless of whether the individual requested help or not. Through a number of helpful surveys and questionnaires, it has been determined that there are few methods that actually prove helpful is securing help when one needs help. The best way discovered to seek help is to request help, using this helpful phrase: “Help plz. Plz help. Sent lots of help. The more help you send, the more I get helped”. Due the positive affirmation towards any would-be helpers of the help being given, the quantity and quality of the help being given by any would-be helper increases ten-fold, as determined by the Helper-Meinhoff equation. In addition, it has also been determined that when an individual chooses not to request help, a feedback loop occurs where help is sent regardless. The mechanics of this phenomenon are unclear, but it is possible that with research into more helpful equations and instruments, and the aid of certain researchers such as Steven Helpkins and Albert Helpstein, a helpful answer to this helpful phenomenon can finally be provided. Such an answer would prove extremely helpful to both professionals and academics alike. In conclusion, help is something we are given when we request help. Help is also something that we are given even when we do not actually specifically request help. Due to positive affirmation, receiving help when we request help makes us feel more helped and request more help in the future. Help can be measured through a scale of helpfulness, and the more helpful something is, the more we get helped, whether we request help or not. Help is our light in the dark, our helping hand when we need help most. Without help we would falter, because all of us need help at some point in our lives, whether we request the help or not. Category:Blog posts